Has someone you loved ever said something to you that caused you to feel like you were not good enough for them or just “less than”? Like they passed a judgment on you and then you felt really discouraged, to the point you forgot where your intrinsic value as a person comes from? I know the feeling and it’s a painful experience. The comments might come from a parent, friend, or significant other. I’ve also felt it from a combination of the people I love and, to be honest, I’ve caused the people I love to feel that way, too. Not on purpose, but they’ve told me I caused them to feel this way, which hurts on the deepest level, because it’s a terrible feeling to not feel worthy of someone’s love.
It always amazes me how one moment I can feel so secure in who I am, and then in a judgment from someone I care about, my self-esteem is shattered and I question my worth. A lot of my training as a coach revolves around finding my DNA in every situation, taking responsibility for my actions, and not playing the victim role. By being mindful in this way, I’m able to take back my power. In situations like these where I am feeling less than, I always think of the quote by Eleanor Roosevelt, “No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.”
Which makes me ask the questions: “Why am I allowing this person’s comments to define my worth? Why am I giving this person so much power and influence over my life? What does define me?
As I think through and answer each of these questions for myself and evaluate them through the lens of my beliefs, everything becomes clear. I begin to see myself the way God sees me.
I have a few close friends whom I go to in these difficult times. These friends always bring me back to God’s Word and remind me of who I am in Christ. They remind me of what God has in store for Ellie and me when we are obedient and seeking His will for our lives. It’s been all too easy to lose sight of what truly matters sometimes. I’ve made decisions that haven’t honored God or been true to my values, but I’m thankful when I lose my way, I have an army of people who point me to God’s grace and love for me. They are there to encourage me to keep running the race and seeking God’s will for my life.
I am a constant work-in-progress. I make good choices and not-so-good choices, and I learn from every decision. I receive God’s grace when I fall down and I ask for help to get back up and keep moving forward. Life isn’t easy and we could all use a little help along the way. My encouragement to you today is if, like me, you’ve based your value on what some else thinks about you and you feel like you’re not enough, I want you to know you can take back your power. Choose to believe the truth about yourself: you are valuable and worthy of love, just as you are. Walk in this truth today! Love and Blessings.
PS – Christmas is only 10 days away! Share the gift of learning the ABCs, as well as building lifetime character lessons with a special child in your life this holiday season. To get your copy of The Ellie Project or The Ellie Project Stationery Set, click here! Order this week to make sure your books arrive before Christmas!
PPS – If you want Ellie and me to come speak and sign some Ellie Project books, shoot me an email at firstname.lastname@example.org. My speech is powerful, inspirational, and about living your legacy today! It’s good for men and women, corporate groups, mom’s groups, Bible Study groups, community groups, etc. Big or small, group size is of no importance. We are excited to come share this powerful message with you!