I know I said the next post would be our engagement story, but I can’t shake the anxiety I am feeling about tomorrow’s doctor’s appointment, so instead I’m gonna vent. I will keep this short and sweet.
The last few days have felt extremely heavy and a little dark. The whole family has been filled with fear and anticipation as we wait to hear the diagnosis. For the most part, I’ve been keeping a positive and hopeful attitude, but it’s not easy seeing Andrew so down.
It hit me today that after tomorrow our life could change completely. The norm for us could be chemo, radiation, surgeries and sickness. Up until this point, being naïve has served me mentally and emotionally, but I’m starting to realize that my eyes are about to be fully exposed to another world. In some ways I don’t feel prepared for what is ahead, but then I remember that God has given me the strength I need and I trust He will continue to do so.
In the middle of the emotional heaviness I find joy in playing with my little Ellie Grace. She makes me laugh, she keeps me busy and she fills my heart with love. Over the last couple of days she tried to drink out of a dog’s water bowl, she nibbled on cat food and she sipped water from a vase of flowers. My mom took her to play (aka spoil her rotten by buying her toys) and when it was time to leave the store my mom told Ellie, “Let’s roll” and so Ellie took the statement literally by attempting a forward roll on the concrete. Later that night Ellie was playing with my mom in the street and Ellie was asked if she was ready to go to sleep. She replied by laying on her stomach in the road and pretending to snore. It’s moments like these that make me smile in the middle of tragedy. Ellie’s love fills my heart and gives me the strength and motivation to keep giving my best every single day for my family.
Thanks for letting me share my thoughts. You all have been such a source of inspiration for me and my family during this difficult time. It’s amazing how I can feel your love from afar. Thank you for coming along on this adventure with us. Bear Hugs from The Heards.
I love that sweet little girl! 🙂 I have pictures and videos on my phone from when I got to babysit her. Every time I see them it brings a smile to my face! She is one precious kid! Love her, love YOU, love Andrew! 🙂 Praying for you guys!
Sweet Bailey…praying for you guys. Thank you for being so transparent and honest. Love you!
Children are a great leveler, a great source of amusement, a huge source of pride and an enormous target for our love. You are fortunate to be able to experience it with Andrew and your precious Ellie.
We will continue on this journey with prayer, hope & joy for your precious family.
God & his Joy can be found in all circumstances even if it is for a brief moment.
Little Ellie Grace is Joy Abundant!!
You, Andrew, Ellie Grace & your parents, siblings are covered in a blanket of Prayer!!!!
May the strength, power, love & compassion of our Lord be your constant companion.
Asking God to be ever present today especially. His Mighty Angels & Saints surround you!
Love & Blessings,
Tammy
You’re right, Bailey. Through the righteousness given to you by what Christ did on the cross and the power of the Holy Spirit that indwells you (Ephesians 3:14-21) you are given ‘every spiritual blessing in the heavenly places’ (Ephesians 1:3). You can get through this … by His power and supernatural work in you. Grace is given in measure … when your needs are rising, His grace is rising to supply you with all you need. All that’s required of us is a submission of our heart (over and over and over) to Him. I’m praying for you guys through all this. My heart is for you in this. Love you!
You are truly amazing. Continuing to pray friend! Love you and your sweet family so much! xoxoxox
Laura McCall
Hi Bailey, I am a total stranger to you, but I have been reading Andrew’s blog and now yours. I am praying for your family today. I am thankful that you have your sweet girl to remind you of God’s love, especially now with all you are going through. It is amazing to think we are the funny little sparks of light for our heavenly father, bringing joy in the midst of this worldly darkness. Sometimes it’s hard to imagine that our creator loves us even more than we are capable of loving our babies. I hope you feel His love and comfort today, that He will lift you up and hold you and Andrew, squeeze you tight, kiss your tears away, and let you feel secure in his strong arms.
Bailey,
I just heard about the battle your family is facing. Can’t begin to understand why or imagine your emotions but please know that Tim and I are grieving, hoping, and praying like crazy for miraculous healing and strength!
-Lizzie
Praying for your precious family as you face the days ahead. Many prayers from your Liberty family. Claire Batey
No words I can offer except that I love you and I’m praying. An amazing couple with a beautiful, lively little girl – you are courageous friend!
Jules