Make No Assumptions


Hello!! I hope you’re off to a great start to the week. I must admit it’s been a little cray cray up in the Heard household recently.

On Monday night, my daughter, Ellie, got really sick and threw up multiple times every hour and then eventually every half hour. By 12 AM she was in a lot of pain and saying her sides were hurting.

I decided to take her to the ER. She threw up several times at the ER and the doctor concluded it was a stomach bug, gave her a Zofran, and sent us on our way. Ellie slept for a couple of hours once we got home before waking up and throwing up again. She then slept a few more hours before waking up for the day.

I could tell she still felt horrible. She didn’t want to get out of bed and only wanted to drink water. My sweet Aunt Betty came over to take care of Ellie while I ran to the store to pick up her prescription and get her some Gatorade and soup.

Cut to me, power-walking into Target, possibly looking like a woman on a Black Friday mission. I had my eye on the prize: get what I needed and get the heck back home to my sick baby.

I gathered up the goods and darted to the checkout isle. As I was getting closer to the checkout lane, I noticed a cart pass me, going in the opposite direction, then whip around rapidly, trailing right beside my cart.

I was so focused on getting back home to El, I didn’t even see the person’s face. I zipped into the first lane that was open and whoever was beside me appeared to pass on by.

I’d just started unloading the groceries onto the belt when a cart pulled in right behind me. Maybe it was the delirium from staying up with Ellie all night, but I was pretty sure the person behind me was the speed racer I had just encountered.

As I continued checking out, I convinced myself I was getting a negative vibe from this person. What added fuel to the fire of this elaborate story I was creating in my mind was when I finally forced myself to look at her as I was paying.

She looked peeved.

I started wracking my brain, wondering what I did to make her so upset. Did she think I cut her off or took the lane she wanted?

Then I noticed she only had a few items on the belt and this made me feel immediate guilt for not noticing earlier and being considerate enough to let her go ahead of me.

I was certain this is what must have set her off. I proceeded to beat the heck out of myself as I walked back to my car, wishing I could have a do-over, but it was too late.

As I drove away, I saw the same woman texting away on her phone. I imagined how she must be texting a friend about how this blonde girl was so rude at Target or, even worse, that somehow she knew me and was telling someone what I witch I was.

I share this ridiculous story, because after beating myself up for a couple of hours, I had a huge realization:

I really didn’t know if what I thought just happened had actually happened.

Truth was, I realized I created a story based on a bunch of assumptions I’d strung together. I don’t know if the peeved face of that woman in line meant she was mad at me or even if she was mad at all.

What I do know is I spent so much time and energy that day feeling guilty and beating myself up about something that may or may not have been true. And even if it was true, it wasn’t on purpose. Can anyone relate?

This is a pattern in my everyday life. I often create stories in my head based on assumptions I make. I then believe these assumptions are true and stress out, feel anxious, and expend way too much energy on situations I don’t actually have the facts about.

So what can I do? Awareness is the first step, then I try and find the humor in it, which doesn’t take long, and this usually shifts me into a better state of mind. From there I let it go and move on.

We’re never going to handle every situation perfectly. Hopefully we do the best we can to do the right thing.

Mistakes are opportunities to learn and grow, so instead of beating ourselves up over them, let’s learn from them, make them right when we can, and give ourselves grace to move onward and upward.

Thank you so much for spending time with me today and for making my 33rd birthday extra special with your well wishes and kind words on FB! You are such a blessing and encouragement to Ellie and me. Love and Blessings.

PS – Christmas is coming up and if you’re wanting a truly meaningful gift for someone you love, then I’d encourage you to check out The Ellie Project. It’s a powerful illustrated children’s book for all ages filled with valuable character lessons.

In fact, a couple of weekends ago I was at a wedding in Florida when a gentleman walked up to Ellie and me and told us how much he loved the book. He said he loved it so much he bought several boxes of The Ellie Project books to share with his friends, family, and clients! So take it from someone other than the co-author. This book is touching lives! Get your signed copy today at If you want to purchase bulk orders of the book, please email me at [email protected], so I can share the discounted price with you, along with free shipping. Plus, Ellie and I will both sign every single copy ☺

PPS – If you have a group, big or small, looking for a speaker then I’d love the opportunity to come encourage through my powerful and inspiring message about transforming life’s challenges into a purposeful life. E-mail me today at [email protected]. Looking forward to hearing from you!